What if the enemy you were taught to fear was never yours to carry?


Hi Reader

I’ve said for years that my mission is to help people realize we have more in common than those who benefit from our divide.

But only recently did I realize how deeply this mission is rooted within me:
That mission was inherited.
Rooted in the very history of my family.


What you can expect in today's issue:

  • A reflection on generational trauma and hidden histories
  • What I learned from my conversation with Dr. Ammara Khalid
  • How inherited silence shapes how we seek connection

Ever since I was a kid, I’d get so excited to visit India and sit next to my maternal grandmother, asking question after question about our family, long before ancestry tests became trendy.

I learned how my great-grandmother was born in Kenya.
How my great-great-grandmother was a royal princess.
How my great-grandfather knew about the Partition years in advance and moved the entire family from Rawalpindi, Pakistan, to Delhi, India, leaving behind property, legacy, and generations of roots.

On my father’s side, it was a little different.
They had no warning or choice.
They fled across the newly drawn border and lived in refugee camps, trying to find safety in the unfamiliar.

Both sides of my family had their lives uprooted by a man-made divide.
Yet, my grandparents would speak about their homes in Pakistan with love and longing. They remembered living peacefully, side by side, with their Muslim neighbors. No hate. No fear. Just community.

Something clicked when I interviewed Dr. Ammara Khalid last week.

Her family fled Delhi, India, for Rawalpindi, Pakistan. And mine did the exact opposite.

We sat there—two South Asian women and two psychologists—talking about how our mirrored histories reminded us of just how false the lines between us are. We even joked about FaceTiming each other from our ancestral homes on opposite sides of the border.

How powerful and radical it is to find that kind of connection when the world insists we should be enemies.

The thing is, this tension they'd want between us isn’t ours. Us getting along and finding common ground as two women with backgrounds as Pakistani and Indian, is precisely what those who created this oppressive narrative don't want.

The fear we’re taught to carry, the separation we’re expected to protect
The hate we’re told to pass down—
It’s all been given to us.
But that doesn’t mean we have to keep it.


Why am I sharing this with you?

Because some of you reading this carry your own version of a fractured history.
It may not be Partition.
But maybe it’s immigration.
Maybe it’s diaspora.
Maybe it’s religion.
Maybe it’s family secrets.
Maybe it’s an ache you inherited but were never allowed to name.

And what I want you to know is this:
You don’t have to keep the silence.
You don’t have to hold the hate.
You don’t have to follow the script that tells you who you should love, trust, or fear.

You can choose empathy.
You can choose to remember.
You can choose to rebuild what fear tried to destroy.

So ask yourself and sit with these questions:

  • What beliefs about “a valid life” have you inherited, but never questioned?
  • Where do you respond to unfamiliarity with quiet judgment, not intentional curiosity?
  • When have you used questions as a shield, rather than an invitation?
  • Who in your life lives differently from you, but might be a mirror if you chose to stay open?

What's Happening, BTS

Updates on Reframing Perspectives Podcast:

If you haven't yet heard my conversation with Dr. Ammara Khalid, it seems only fitting to hear it after reading this newsletter. At its core, the conversation revealed something bigger: our deep need for belonging—and the fear that keeps us from seeking it. Tune into this episode here.

  • And friends, if you're enjoying these episodes, the biggest favor I can ask you is to
    • Share them with your friends and family,
    • Subscribe to the podcast, and leave reviews!

As a new podcaster, each of these things helps tremendously in making sure I deliver better episodes!

Exciting News!! I'm headed to the Podcast Movement Conference.

As a new podcaster, I'm consistently learning how to improve the quality of our conversations, guests, and topics. I was very grateful when I received a scholarship to attend the Podcast Conference this upcoming week! I'll be sure to share more through the community I build over the next week :)

Our Fall Season Plans

And I'm excited to bring a few exciting experiences to life this fall.

  • Changemaker Dinners + Immersion Experiences. We carefully bring 8 to 10 thinkers, thought leaders, founders, and creatives together to commune over deep conversations that build relationships with those committed to bettering the world. We're hosting them in DC, Chicago, and NYC.
    • NYC Experience: Immerse yourself in an experience that addresses: Is it gentrification or the natural evolution of neighborhoods?
    • Chicago: The Dispartiy of Education: How do we democratize education in a broken system?
    • D.C., your home is your sanctuary. It represents your ancestral heritage and the vulnerability of your relationship with yourself and your community.

If you're interested in sitting at this table, please submit your interest here.

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How you can work directly with Dr. Beri and the RKE Team when you're ready:

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Book me to speak or facilitate a workshop at your next work event or conference.

Topics:

Navigating chaos and uncertainty

The Relationship Economy

The Power of an Unapologetic Woman

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Disruptive Empathy Advisory

Let's partner and design immersive, story-driven experiences for your mission so the people you're trying to reach don’t just see your impact, they stand with it.

It’s how movements are born: when a mission becomes personal.

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Reframing Perspectives with Dr. Payal Beri

We’ve been divided on purpose. I teach people to see it, feel it, and let empathy rewrite the story. Every week, you’ll receive thought-provoking insights, human-first storytelling, and bold reframes designed to challenge how we are reclaiming our humanity through our daily actions. Whether building movements, reshaping culture, or simply asking better questions, this space is for you. Welcome home.

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